Way back in 2013 I blogged about a dream I’d had in great detail. And you can read that post right here in this link.

While I had forgotten the dream in full, and the year in which I had it, I always remembered parts of it.

Late last year in November, I was having a clean-up of this website, adding things from my Porn Star Brothers website so I could close that down, and sending lots of old posts back into draft mode. I kept coming across a post about a dream I’d had but thought nothing of it. I updated the size of the picture, changed the tags, and didn’t think anything more. And then one day, while cleaning through the posts, as it took quite a few days, I decided to read it, and lo and behold, it was a post about the dream.

My jaw hit the floor as I saw how great a detail the dream had been in and how much I’d forgotten. So I pasted the post into a word doc, tidied up the spelling, and printed it out. I then made a bullet list of points from the post and printed that out as well.

Why?

Because I’m going to turn that dream into a book.

Also…

The actor from that dream, the one I mentioned in the post and how I’d been seeing him in a Kellogs Just Right ad back then, well, he’s back on air with another ad eight years on. But this time it’s for a Toyota Hilux and the damn song playing over the top of it is Don’t Stop Believing from Journey. Or, depending on what generation you are, the whole first season of Glee.

Now, I could take this as a sign.

I generally don’t believe in signs anymore. I DID stop believing in them years ago as they never seemed to amount to anything, but in the last couple of years I’ve kind of figured that some things might just be signs after all. Like finding a black cat on my roof, for example. I bought extra lotto tickets after that, but nothing came of it. See, what’s the point in believing?

I try and listen to my muse and guides and helpers when it comes to my writing, but rarely get a whisper.

Well, if I want to stretch this ad out into a sign, then there’s been a few since 2013 and I could maybe stretch a few things that have happened recently into more signs.

So let’s start…

1 – It’s been 8 years since that Kellogs ad and that dream. Asian cultures believe the number 8 to be lucky and signify wealth. It’s also the infinity symbol. And it’s more than likely the whole reason why I used him for a character in the novel I wrote that year. Now titled, The Billionaire’s Dirty Little Secret, the book is dedicated to him and has been since it was first published under its old title in 2014.

2 – The same actor is back in an ad. Even though I can’t remember when the ad actually started on TV, it’s been going for a while and has been especially prolific in the last month coming into April. Every time I change the channel, there he is. Every time I walk into a different room of the house that has a TV on, there he is. And so is that damn song…

A sign…maybe…

3 – The song. Don’t Stop Believing. Well, what’s that supposed to mean? Don’t stop believing in what I’m doing? Don’t stop believing in the path I’m on? Don’t stop believing in my writing? Don’t stop believing that what I’m doing is the right thing? Don’t stop believing that the choices I’m making are the right ones? Don’t stop believing in him? Yeah, weird thought that.

As for those choices…

4 – That dream eight years ago… Well last year it came back with a vengeance and I decided to write a novel about it. That’s right. I made that decision last year, long before the ad started playing on TV and I even knew he was in another one. How’s that for kismet?

5 – Also last year, in August, I asked about an author group at my local library. Not something I’d normally do, and something I actually almost forgot to ask. And while they didn’t have one, it was very quickly put on the cards as there is so much interest in publishing these days. So that was timed right in me asking. But it kept being pushed back, and back, and now it’s come to fruition this month. Yes, THIS month! AS IN 8 MONTHS SINCE I FIRST ASKED! So while it’s been delayed, that ad is on TV blaring Don’t Stop Believing…

I have always said no to 99% of things, as caring for my mother means I don’t get to do much on my own and I never think I can do them in the first place for so many reasons. I’ve missed out on a lot in life and refuse to miss out on anymore. Because this is one thing I know in my gut I need to do because of what it will bring. And I actually believe that this group will be a massive success, and bring massive success to me personally.

And last year, when I was asked if I wanted to run that group, I automatically said no. All because it’s become a habit due to caring for mum. But within half an hour of that phone call I regretted it so incredibly badly that I mentally kicked myself for the next week. And my muse, guide, or helper actually said to me, “stop saying NO and start saying YES, otherwise you’ll have nothing”. So, fuck yeah it is!

And when I dream, I dream big. Go hard or fuck off, basically. Well, I’m sick of fucking off, so this year I’m going hard.

6 – After mum was in hospital for two weeks in January, I started feeling very flat and, once again, exhausted physically, emotionally, and mentally. I knew I needed to change the way I was, and I knew it had to be different. So, I decided that it was time to get my health in order as much as possible, and stop saying NO, and start saying YES.

After being low in iron for almost four years due to excessive bleeding, I decided to go back on the pill to correct my incredibly wayward menstrual cycle. I also decided to go to the gym. After chatting with one of the girls in March, I sat down with my budget and schedule for the year and came up with a cost and date to start. And then realised it was the Easter Monday public holiday and chose the Monday after so it coincided with the writers’ group.

I’ve envisioned myself svelte and sassy in October for the imaginary six month anniversary of the writers’ group and how fabulous I’ll look when said actor turns up to support his currently imaginary friend and he’ll fall head over heels in love with me at first sight. And there’ll be a massive blue neon arrow that has never worked, but it will suddenly turn itself on and point to him, and it won’t be plugged in so I’ll definitely know that paranormal activity is happening.

Like I said, go hard or fuck off!

7 – This year is the tenth year that I’ve been self-publishing. There’s the whole, ten years or ten thousand hours thing. Well, it’s ten years, baby! And eight years from that dream! Ten and infinity! Shit must be ready to happen!

8 – He lives on the Gold Coast, albeit at his parents’ farm, more than likely as the caretaker of said farm. But, it’s where I want to live. The Gold Coast, that is. And regardless of how many times I buy tickets in Queensland’s RSL Art Union draws (another thing that’s not coming to fruition), there is still the whole, ten years, infinity thing.

So, there you have it. From 2013 to 2021, a list of signs that I could string together to create something out of nothing. I could believe in them or not. I could stop believing in them or not.

So maybe the choice of song by Toyota, and putting HIM in an ad eight years after the one that inspired my dream about us and the book that will be based on it, is a sign after all.

Eight signs from a dream I had eight years ago, in a year that has been ten years since I first started publishing.

If those bitches aren’t signs, I have no fucking idea what they are! So let’s date this post, and the last post, and see what happens by the end of 2021!

This post was posted on 25/4/2021. The dream was posted on 25/4/2013.